I Still Love You...
by Ztarlight
Summary: Mild slash. Mucho angst. Horribly OOC. Dedicated to David, but you all are welcome to R&R. I seriously need some caffeine.


[A/N - This is something I felt I had to write. It really contains no purpose other then allowing me to alleviate some of the pain that has built up in me over the past two days. I broke up with my boyfriend on Monday, and I've been feeling kinda down since then. This is for him. So David, whether you review this or not, I hope you see this, and I want you to know that I still care about you, and I want to thank you for making the last 5 months Heaven on earth for me.]  
  
[Disclaimer: I don't own IZ. Any money that I might be making is not from my fics, but from my cheap babysitting job. Yay me.]  
  
  
  
I Still Love You...  
  
  
Dib slid onto the park bench next to Zim on that chilly autumn day, biting his lip nervously. "I got your message..." he said. "I got here as fast as I could."  
  
"Good."  
  
Silence.  
  
"So..." the human started, "You sounded so urgent over the phone. Is something wrong?"  
  
"Yes." Zim replied curtly. "I've been thinking... and it's been causing me pain."  
  
Dib tenderly placed his hands on Zim's right shoulder, the one of which he was closest to. "Why hide it, Zim? We always talk about things... you even said talking helps you."  
  
"Not this time." The foreign being stood up, looking away. "This time, what I tell you will cause you pain, and for once, I don't want that."  
  
"Zim, I..." Dib took a breath. "I don't understand...."  
  
Zim sighed. "Before we fell in....," he struggled with the next word, "...love, I was studying your human emotions and noticed a start and end to them all."  
  
Dib gasped. "Oh Zim..."  
  
"It was a quite a common event; watching couples depart and enemies become lovers... such as we have."  
  
"No, Zim..."  
  
"But, I also made a note that sometimes, the couples got back together, and the former enemies became rivals once more."  
  
"Zim..." Dib choked back a sob, "You can't mean---"  
  
"Oh but I DO mean..." Zim hissed. "It's not you Dib, really it's not. It's just... it's part of your human emotions. I took them in during my stay here on earth, and I'm just going through the cycle."  
  
"...."  
  
Zim looked to the ground in slight shame. "What I mean to say is.... I love you, but I'm not *in* love with you."  
  
Silence enveloped them once more.  
  
"I'm... sorry, Dib. But... I can't deny how I feel..."  
  
At long last, Dib finally felt that he could open his mouth without crying. "It... it's alright, Zim. I-I understand..."  
  
"I just.... I didn't want to pretend to be something I wasn't... I didn't want to say I was in love you and not mean it. I know that would only hurt you even further."  
  
"Yeah...."  
  
The silence now was deafening. Dib had to say something... just to prove he could still hear.  
  
"So..."  
  
Zim was still focused intently on the ground. "I... guess this is goodbye or something."  
  
Dib nodded slowly. "Right.... butZim!" he cried quickly.  
  
He looked up. "Yes... Dib?"  
  
"Could... could I have just one kiss goodbye?"  
  
Zim shrugged lightly. "If that's what you want..." he sighed, drawing Dib closer.  
  
Dib tilted his head slightly to the right and pushed his face closer towards Zim's lips. A soft stroke of flesh against his mouth told him he had made the desired contact, but when he felt Zim's reptilian tongue penetrate the embrace, he suddenly pulled back. "No."  
  
Zim stepped back in shock. "what? But Dib, I thought you wan---"  
  
"Not if it has no meaning. Goodbye Zim," he hissesd sharply and turned and ran, quickly, in hope to push his tears back to their source.  
  
"But... DIB! WAIT!"  
  
But the Dib did not wait. He ran faster, wheezing against the cold autumn air. It stung his lungs and wet eyes, and blew with a haunting freedom that Dib, deep in his heart, did not desire.  
  
Zim sat on the park banch and put his head in his hands. "What have I done to you, Dib? This is worse than any death I could've given you..." He glanced up weakly. "Wait, please..." he begged in whisper of the swiftly fading figure.  
  
"I still love you...." 


End file.
